Why I've decied to blog///

For years now, I've wanted to write my thoughts, feelings and life experiences. I'd done it when I was in college but I ended up burning the journals in a guilty/shameful moment. Now, I'm at a point where I can care less about what people think about my blog and whether I want to open up to the world, but most importantly, to myself. I have a bad memory. I base that on my bad genes as well as my alcohol/drug consumprion as an adolescent. I totally screwed with my mind and body. That's ok, there are other ways to record life memories, thought, feelings and sensations. Last year I bought a camcorder ( on credit) from sears and sometimes forget to record very important life expereinces such as my kids bday or other mamadas. I've decided that having a blog will allow me to record these experiences on paper, or tthrough the virtual world. This is also a way for me to open up to the world. I feel like I'm not open with people the way i'd like to. I feel that people don't really know me. I was not taught that expressing oneslef was a positive thing, therefore I have a tendency to hold back. I want to break the reigns of isolation and a quiet voice. i want to share with the world, and whoever is willing to listen, my heart, my mind and my voice. I made a commitmen to not hold back, to speakthe truth, according to me, and to be vulnerable, despite criticism or praise. I do this not for praise (for once) but for growth. This will also allow me to look back when I am older and remember things that my memory will fail to remember. It's the worse feeline ever to not remember an important part of your life and feel aimless like a walking mummy with no cause. This blog will be my memory. This blog will help me.